It seems like only yesterday that Curtis and Bobby were welcoming the King of the Nerds season two cast to Nerdvana. After seven weeks of awesome reality television only the Final Four remain. Former Midas Touch Attack team member, Jack, a 24 year old Bioengineer and three former members of the Titans of Rigel: Brian the 25 year old Historian, Xander, a 26 year old gamer and Kayla, a 28 year old Rocket Scientist – and the only female left in the game. Those of you that did not watch season one are not aware of the “popularity contest” that crowned Celeste Anderson the winner; it was a Survivor-Style vote by all of the Nerded Off players. Curtis and Bobby promised that season two would not be the same, but I’ll talk more about that later. Let’s get to it.
After the Nerd Off, the Final Four is enthusiastic that Zack has been vanquished by Jack and Xander is ready to drink! Bubbly is uncorked, poured and Jack has prepared a toast. According to Xander it is a very long-winded toast and the editors allow us to see the best bits in which Jack accounts for the volatile personality of Zack, how he might have seemed like a bad guy at first and how people can change and that Zack is an inspiration. I agree! I never thought Zack was a bad guy, though; I’ve been very clear in these blogs about that and I’m a little bothered that everyone is focusing on what Zack learned about himself. Sure, I wasn’t in Nerdvana with the guy, but I know what it’s like to be in that kind of position. A person can only take so much apathy and disregard from their community or social group before self-preservation mode kicks in and I just can’t blame Zack for his behavior. Kind of dealing with that myself right now…
Anyway… The next morning after everyone is dressed and ready to go, it’s time for the next competition and Curtis and Bobby aren’t playing around. Two nerds will be eliminated in the last Nerd War, the first annual King of the Nerds season finale Quiz Bowl. Basically, it’s Jeopardy, but all players answer the question and a point is awarded for each correct answer. The super nerdy categories are: Gaming, Fantasy, Math and Logic, Memory, Sci-Fi, Science, Comic Books and Video Games. There are five levels of difficulty: Easy Peasy, A Bit Tricky, Getting Touch, Ridiculously Hard and Brain Melter. The first two to answer five questions correctly will earn the spots available in the final Nerd Off; the other two will be banished. The stakes are higher than in Zombie Nerd Plunk!
So Jack is a little nervous; he’s not a trivia person, but Brian is “Trivia Guy” and he’s lock, stock and ready to rock. A random draw gives Kayla the first crack at the Quiz Bowl wall and the game begins. Everyone has a strategy behind their question choice; Kayla and Xander are focusing on subjects familiar to them and Kayla is, in addition, choosing topics she thinks the boys won’t know. Jack will choosing difficult math and science questions since those are his strong areas, but Brian is going to mix it up and pick categories that he thinks the others won’t expect him to choose. Jack takes the lead about midway through the edit of the challenge with three points, Xander and Kayla are tied with two questions answered correctly and Brian is in last place with one. A few more questions later, Jack is one point away and he chooses the easiest science question; it doesn’t matter if anyone else answers correctly – as long as he gets it right, he moves on and move on he does!
With only one spot left, and everyone’s scores tied, the last Nerd War comes down to one question and the choice is Xander’s who decided to level the playing field between him and Brian by going “Brain Melter” on a Math and Science question. In the Diary Room, Kayla reminds us that, um, she was there too. Yeah, Xander, did you forget that Kayla, a Rocket Scientist was to your left?! … So here’s the final question, which Xander is at first thrilled to learn is video game-related: Assuming that PAC-MAN is a four-foot wide sphere, what is his surface area? Not the kind of video game question he would have liked… Xander, Xander, Xander… Only Kayla answers correctly and the last girl left in the competition will compete in the final Nerd Off with Jack.
As for Brian and Xander, well… Their time in Nerdvana has not yet come to an end; they have very important tasks to perform and they will not be alone. All of the banished nerds are back! After a joyful reunion, Curtis explains that this year will be different from last year in so much that the final Nerd Off will consist of an “epic gauntlet of eight mental games” called the Nerdliminator! Jack and Kayla must now appeal to the fallen nerds because they will be choosing which of the finalists to support in the final challenge.
Back in Nerdvana, and all together, everyone participates in a clink drink toast then it is party time! Nerds party differently, though, as Kelsey tells us; mock battles are being fought in addition to the Nerf war called on by Xander, Josh is doing headstands against the T.A.R.D.I.S, but Kayla still has on her game face. She has no plans to party hard and she is going to make some time to speak with everyone. Jack plans to do the same and he is targeting the support of nerds that Kayla will need, specifically Chris, Mary Kate and Nicole. Even if Kayla does get more supporters, though, Jack is confident that his experience in Nerd Offs still makes him the stronger competitor. Meanwhile, the T.A.R.D.I.S has become Kayla’s command center and of course, she is looking towards her Star Trek hero, Captain Kathryn Janeway for inspiration. Katie and Brian are definitely on her side and Kayla wants to win so bad! She keeps thinking of a comment made by Janeway about her ship, her crew and their expectation of her to be larger than life; she only hopes she can be that for them. The sentiment brings a tear to Brian’s eye, awwww! Katie think’s it is so cheesy, but Star Trek is Kayla’s religion!
What follows is more nerd partying. Xander is playing the keyboard, Josh is rapping, Zack’s got a drum then all of the sudden Josh pulls out a Feelings Flute and Nicole has one with butterflies on it and omg… It’s amazing. So many memories of Benvention… I still haven’t explained what Benvention is, but for now, just think of it as King of the Nerds without the prize money and elaborate competitions. Oh, there were games, video and otherwise, and plenty of pizza and Mountain Dew… And booze… You nerds get way more alcohol than any other group of reality show contestants and it’s so funny that so few of you take advantage of it! There are a lot of jealous Big Brother contestants out there right now – they could really use it. Moving on!
For the last time this season, Curtis calls all nerds to the courtyard. A new King of the Nerds will be crowned that day, but first, there is a little matter of the fallen nerds choosing their allegiances. On Team Jack: Kelsey, Josh, Mary Kate and Zack; on Team Kayla: Nicole, Katie, Chris, Xander and Brian. Jack feels really good about his team, Zack has a lot of Nerd Off experience and everyone else’s special areas of interest and expertise are fairly equal to those of the supporters on Kayla’s side of the battle field. He feels his odds of winning are one hundred percent. To the throne room for the Nerdliminator!
With the Throne, the crown and the $100,000 up for grabs, Kayla and Jack will have to work around a wheel of nerdy tests: a pop culture math problem, a periodic table puzzle, a cipher, a Sudoku, a logic puzzle, a spatial problem solving puzzle, nerd words and PAC-MAN. They have twenty minutes and the nerd with the most right answers wins and they may bring in three other nerds to help them and can only use one nerd per puzzle. Jack knows he can do it, Kayla is excited and nervous. When the clock stars, both begin with the pop culture math problem. Jack is having trouble with the pop culture and Kayla is struggling with the math so she moves on, skipping over what Katie calls the “Weird Rope Thing No One Understands” and starts in the nerd word find. Jack does the same.
Once Jack turns the table, Mary Kate notices that he has mistakes all over his pop culture math quiz, but the supporters aren’t allowed to speak unless spoken to. It’s driving her crazy. Since both are working on it, Curtis lets us at home know that in addition to finding the words, they also have to solve an anagram from letters found in the nerd word find. With only fifteen minutes remaining, Xander tells us that they could have heard a pin drop it was so quiet in the Throne Room; until Curtis shouts that they only have fifteen minutes remaining. The sudden announcement startles everyone, but it sort of lightens the mood as Jack decides to skip over to the periodic table puzzle. Then Kayla finally calls upon Brian to help her – he was itching to get all up in those words!
As Jack becomes more and more frustrated with the periodic table puzzle, his supporters start to wonder why he isn’t calling upon them for help. Zack is starting to lose it, but he’s following the no talking rule very well, especially after Jack moves ahead again! The PAC-MAN station, in which, only one level must be completed, is where Jack decides to put his attention and he’s owning it while Kayla and Brian finish the nerd word find. Kayla steps over to the Sudoku station, Jack finishes his PAC-MAN level and begins the cipher and he’s still not asking anyone for help! Zack is about to pop out of his skin at this point and when Jack even hints as asking for help, he is all over it.
Ten minutes remaining! (This time the announcer is Bobby and just as loud). Kayla slides over to periodic table puzzle and immediately calls upon Nicole and girl, she’s already got that puzzle solved! Both pairs finish quickly and move on to the next station; for Jack it’s Sudoku and he looks to Josh for help who isn’t the best at the number puzzle, but he agrees to help the seemingly clueless Jack. Kayla has moved on to a math problem and asks Chris for help and he says… NO?! Curse your sudden, but inevitable betrayal! Actually, he just didn’t want Kayla to waste his help on that problem; when she asks for help with the cipher, he steps down to the wheel as her last helper of the Nerd Off – and he solves the puzzle quickly. Jack and Josh are still working on the cipher and with five minutes remaining, Kayla gets to work on the logic problem, seems to solves it, then switches over to PAC-MAN as Jack gives up on Sudoku.
With Mary Kate’s help, and only a minute left on the clock, Jack returns to the pop culture math quiz and Kayla is not doing well at PAC-MAN. Kayla hates PAC-MAN and could care less about it! (That’s not what she really said…<wink>). Mary Kate helps Jack score another point, but before he can really get started with the weird rope thing, time is up and the waiting begins. After everything has been tallied, after the Nerdliminators have been cleared from the Throne Room, everyone stands before Curtis and Bobby. The final score is five to four – a very close game – and the winner is… Kayla!!! Another girl has won King of the Nerds!
And do you know what this show needs? A live reunion show to talk about everything that happened in the season! Just like Big Brother, it’s just *BAM* done. Also, a season three would be nice, (more seasons would be better). As of publishing this blog, the nerds and Curtis are still urging people to fill out this survey and if you love the show, you should! I’ve also written a very open letter to the TBS executives in charge of renewing King of the Nerds – it’s published on my blogspot blog and will remain the most recent post until the decision has been made. I encourage everyone to submit their own “piece of heart” either in your own blogs, through Twitter while tagging @tbsveryfunny and @KingofNerdsTBS (don’t forget your hashtags!), or you are also free to post to your heart’s content on the King of the Nerds official Facebook page.
So it’s time to wrap this up and post it, but first… To the cast: I love you guys! You have made writing this blog so much more fun and I’m still so flattered that you like reading it. My dad would be beside himself with excitement, pride and joy. You’ve all got bright futures ahead of yourselves and I know that you will all continue to inspire nerds young and old for years to come. Until next time, stay nerdy, my friends!
